My 16-Year-Old Self 'n Me

Not too long ago, a friend of mine from high school (we were Academic Team buddies) posted an entry on her blog about writing to herself at 16. I made a comment and Jamie suggested it might be good Blog Fodder, and the more I thought about it, the more I agreed.

And I really agreed with Jamie on a lot of things. I wasted so much time as a teenager, worried about what everyone else thought. I tried so hard to be perfect, so hard to do whatever it took to keep everyone else happy, and I never really thought about what it was that might make me happy. I lived a very long time trying to be what I was expected to be. I got married because I had friends doing it. I was bored, I was tired of going to school, and it seemed like people (cough, cough, former in-laws) expected it, so there you go.

Sometimes I wonder, at 33, what it would be like to have all those years back. To take the time to think about what I enjoy, and what I like, and make decisions based on that, instead of what I thought I was expected to do and be. Figuring those things out now makes the whole process of making them a reality a lot harder than if I'd even thought of it at say 23.

But, there is always time to fix things. And I've come to realize that life is not necessarily about setting these big goals and knocking them down, but more about the little, everyday things that make those big goals more bearable, or more achievable.

So, 16 year old Kelly, if they ever make a time machine, and we collectively decide to go back and start figuring stuff out, remember this - be yourself. Your true, authentic, bottom of your heart self, not the one that fits in with everyone else, not the one that is afraid to rock boats and wants to be popular, but the real Kelly. And never, ever, ever give up. Those are things people cannot decide for you, and that cannot be taken away.


Catching Up

It's been a bit since I blogged last, and a lot has happened. Since I'm fond of lists, I'll update in list format:

- My job changed. Basically I got called into the Big Boss' office and told they were moving me from the front desk to a Buyer's Assistant. Actually, it's two buyers, so Buyers' Assistant. The person formerly filling that role is now the front desk person. I'm not sure how I feel about that, since it's totally not in line with what I want to do in the long run, but it's a bit better pay and I don't have to sit in the fish bowl anymore, so there's that. (I'm also not sure how I feel about being told I'm being moved, but whatever.)

- It has been hotter than an un-air conditioned August in Hades. And it's only June. I got too hot over the weekend, wasn't drinking enough water, and got a little heat exhaustion. I'm feeling better now, but I lost most of the weekend and most of the day today dealing with that. So, remember to drink lots of water and eat small meals regularly kids.

- One of the things we did over the weekend was a little Sarah Shopping on Sunday. John's idea for air-conditioned Father's Day fun. I bought her 18 month sizes, and they fit her perfectly. My just turned eight months old daughter is now in size four diapers and 18 month clothes. Do they have baby cage fighting for girls? I may have contender.

- Mom and Zane are coming out for Fourth of July weekend. We'll pick them up after work on Friday at the airport and drop them back off Monday afternoon. I am VERY excited to see them. Mom is already planning on coming back out for Sarah's birthday in October, and yes, I am already starting to plan her admittedly-small birthday party. Because it's never too early to start planning the first birthday, right?



So we've been busy the last few days. Briana has been with us for a couple of weeks, and is going back home on Sunday, so my spare time has been taken up with her, and doing things as a temporary family of four.

It's been fun. We took the girls to the Houston Zoo last Saturday, and on Sunday we went to the pool. It was Sarah's first time, and she did really well. John was off work on Monday and took Briana to Johnson Space Center, and then on Tuesday his mom came up from El Paso and the four of them went to Galveston and to Moody Gardens. Sarah sat through a 3D movie about dinosaurs and apparently did quite well. We had dinner with John's mom on Tuesday evening, and she made it back yesterday evening. It was a quick visit, but they enjoyed themselves.

Work has been crazy. Suffice to say that is all I can say. I am pursuing a long-put-aside dream of working in Human Resources, and am also looking into what classes I'll need from the local community college to get me ready for University of Houston (or wherever I go.) Thanks to those who have reminded me that I do not need some lofty goal of Wanting To Help People to be good at it, and that there is plenty of room for someone who wants to cut the crap, get work done, and even get my Excel on.

Blogging is the first thing that falls to the wayside. I'm trying to remember to just write, but sometimes things just don't come out, or they sound odd and stilted. I'm hoping that by just putting things out there, my writing will improve.

Naturally, I will leave you with pictures of Princess Fussy Teething Will Never End, Will It?
Hanging out at the Houston Zoo.
Chilling by the pool.